Help Wanted

Party Plan Girl · Post by **Party Plan Girl** » Sun Aug 28, 2011 9:00 am

My doctors have been telling me to avoid stress, as much as possible.

Due to the stress and poor treatment, from members of this community, I am now looking for someone to take over the children's events, that my volunteers and I have contributed to the community. Maybe Judy Boyle or the boosters may want to take over the Halloween and/or winter carnivals as fundraisers for the school. or maybe these events aren't necessary, or wanted, at all. I guess I'm just not tough enough to put up with this kind of treatment and I am tired of hurting from it, over the past years. Maybe if I had a long standing family name, my ideas, my assistance and I would be accepted and appreciated... maybe not.

I was planning some fun community activity fundraisers, so the children's events could remain free to the community, the financial burden was removed from the local businesses, and some fun could be had by all who participated. I was never in competition with any other group or organization, for funding, you have only perceived it to be so.

Because I love to help, and it is like therapy for me, I will still offer decorating for events at the churches, the library and the health center, at no charge. I will also continue to offer my help,to some, at no cost, with fundraisers and activities/events that I am only assisting with, not organizing. I try to charge as little as possible. I wish I could do it all for free, for everyone (some expect this) but then, I could never hope to get a business up and running. I was born "legally blind" and am going, completely, blind. I have never collected SSI (Social Security Income) because, I always believed that someone needed it more then me and I am capable of working. I have worked hard, for most of my life. I love what I do. I have helped with my first island wedding and hope to do more. My business will help to bring, much needed, revenue to the island. I have also paid the residents who have helped me. I do not understand why I receive such opposition and resentment. I am only trying to do good things, here, and I am snubbed and shunned for it. Is this what being a Christian is all about?

If you would like to consider taking over the Easter activities or the Halloween carnival or possibly the winter carnival or, if I can be of assistance to your future events, please call: 448-2020.

Thank you for your time and consideration.
Tina Walker

bibabes+2 · Post by **bibabes+2** » Sun Aug 28, 2011 9:11 am

Dear Tina,
I am so sorry to read your post. I am even more saddened to hear you talk about your treatment by some people who live on Beaver Island. On the surface it seems such a nice place to visit and live but obviously there is a dark side to the island and the treatment of people who were not fortunate enough to be born there. Unfortunately it sounds like some long term residents think they are better than those who chose to move there. So sad to hear.
People in GR are sending you their love and support for the wonderful events that you have put on for the youth of the island.
Cheryl

Party Plan Girl · Post by **Party Plan Girl** » Sun Aug 28, 2011 9:48 am

Thanks for the love and support. You have always given it! I have heard that this is how it has been, here on the island, for a very long time. You are right, it is very sad and I wonder if they will ever learn to get beyond themselves. Hopefully, someone will step-up so the children and the rest of the community doesn't loose out on these events. Hopefully, someday, things will get better, for everyone's sake.

Party Plan Girl · Post by **Party Plan Girl** » Tue Aug 30, 2011 5:56 pm

Although I feel mentally and physically exhausted, WE WILL have the 2011 Halloween Carnival. It will have a pirate theme and a photo op' for kids and adults. If anyone might want to learn the ins-and-outs of this type of event or, if you already have prior knowledge and experience of how to run this kind of function and would like to take over, please call me at 448-2020. Thank you.
Tina Walker

Party Plan Girl · Post by **Party Plan Girl** » Wed Aug 31, 2011 9:38 am

I would like to thank the people who have been so kind and supportive, as I go through this transition. You are like rays of sunshine on a dark cloudy day. I never expected such heartfelt care and concern.

Thank you, to the kind people of our community, who are aware of what has been going on, through the years, you have always been caring and supportive of our efforts.

I need to clarify that the poor treatment, from members this community, is not, just, from long term islanders.

I would also like to apologize if I have ever offended anyone, here, for any reason, because some people have given me nasty looks whenever I held an event, helped with other events, or just lent out props for plays and other performances. Several people came over to our, first ever, 4th of July parade float, and felt it necessary to give me dirty looks and make nasty comments and I really have no idea why. Will someone PLEASE explain this to me? I really do not understand this kind of behavior.

I have never been in competition with anyone, for any reason. I only try to put forth my best efforts, with whatever I do.
Tina Walker

jrunberg · Post by **jrunberg** » Wed Aug 31, 2011 9:58 am

tina you do a great job dont let some get you down

Party Plan Girl · Post by **Party Plan Girl** » Wed Aug 31, 2011 12:28 pm

Thanks John, you have always been one of the supportive people. I will remember and appreciate this, always. ...and thanks for having the courage, to post your support, on the forum, and not give-a-rip of who sees it nor care what anyone else thinks. It takes courage to do that. God bless you.

I know I am not the only one, here, who has been hurt, or is hurting, from the cruelty of others. I also know that this can be a tough place to live and, if people do speak out, sometimes things can become, even worse for them. You know who you are and I just want you to know that YOU ARE NOT ALONE and my heart goes out to you. May God bless and keep you safe in HIS love. I do pray that things will get better and I am sick and tired of hearing people say, "That's just how it is, here on Beaver Island." It does not have to remain this way, it only takes the willingness of people to open their hearts, and a desire for change.

We should treat eachother as we, ourselves, would want to be treated.
...and in my humble opinion, we are hear to be kind to, and take care of, eachother.

bibabes+2 · Post by **bibabes+2** » Wed Aug 31, 2011 2:05 pm

Sooooo sad to read this about a place so many of us have fallen in love with and believe to be a paradise.
Cheryl

mcdonoughdiane · Post by **mcdonoughdiane** » Wed Aug 31, 2011 2:39 pm

I would like to put a different spin on this! I came here in the Fall of '98 with my husband and three kids. My kids liked to play softball(baseball) and so do I. There was nothing of the sort on the Island so I decided to start a program wich involved 1st graders to Adults twice a week. I ran this program for 10 years with the help of many non-Islanders: Wendy White, Ron Stith, Kerry Smith, etc! I have also strengthened the Sports Boosters Program for 10 years! I am not here to toot my own horn just to point out that I am NOT an Islander and have accomplished many things on this Island. I am NOT the only Non-Islander who has accomplished many things on this Island!

Unfortunately you will have negative people no matter were they are from!

You will find that the majotiry of island people wether they live here year round or not are wonderful people! To the ones that are not wonderful.......You need to just ignore them like the rest of us do!

Tina, I am sorry for you feeling bad!......Hold your head high as the kids have truly loved your Halloween parties, etc.! I have not attended any of them since my kids are older and have moved away!

On this Island the businesses are truly hit hard for donations to many organizations! I could list them all but there are so many that I would get a cramp in my hand typing them all! I see you fund the Halloween parties and others on your own so am not sure why you would get these dirty looks you are talking about, Hopefully it is just a misunderstanding?

I have some free time now that I don't have kids in High Scool any longer and have since resigned from other activites........If you need help on your next adventure, just ask and hopefully I can fill a spot!

Yes there are nasty people everywhere but don't let them ruin your day(s).....they aren't worth it.

Good Luck in the future in all you decide to do!

Diane McDonough

Sheri Timsak · Post by **Sheri Timsak** » Wed Aug 31, 2011 7:39 pm

I totally agree Diane - many of the adults/children have benefited from all that you do Tina- the problem is that any and all of the negative comments and publicity located on this forum are leading others that may not know the kindness and generosity of Beaver Island to believe otherwise- mine, my parents and grandparents lineage as well as their blood, sweat and tears are in this island and i would appreciate it if "the islanders" was used less in comments that are made. Tina you are appreciated and regarded by the people who know what you are all about and i myself wouldn't worry about those others- don't let the "bad apples" spoil your love for Beaver Island.

BI Community Center · Post by **BI Community Center** » Wed Aug 31, 2011 9:46 pm

The Community Center and PABI have participated in several events with Tina and are extremely grateful for her generous commitments, dedication and sharing of her resources! Most recently she supplied wonderful decorations and countless volunteer hours of installation and cleanup (all of which she coordinated) for the PABI "Vegas Nite" fundraiser.

We applaud and support her efforts to provide the youth of our community opportunities to be engaged, entertained, treated and educated. Not to mention her ability to build and inspire teams of volunteers involving all sectors of our adult community!

The true value of all these efforts is intangible, and not often spoken...it lies in the memories of all those involved.

Thank you, Tina!

Party Plan Girl · Post by **Party Plan Girl** » Thu Sep 01, 2011 9:39 am

I wish I would have responded to Diane's post, last evening but I was just too tired. (Maybe I wasn't meant to). These past few days, I have received several phone calls and gotten several hugs, when I have gone out shopping and run errands. People have been sharing their own painful experiences with me, about their poor treatment, from people on the island. I am not sure where to go from here... I know that people don't want Beaver Island to be seen in-a-bad-light, so to speak, and that IS NOT my intention, but we are being given a unique opportunity to deal with a, long standing, problem here, within our community. So, do we just ignore this opportunity and let things go on, as they have been. because some people are worried about how we will look, to people reading the forum or do we, as a community, deal with this, very real problem, right here and now and let others see that we are willing and attempting to work through this TOGETHER, in the hopes of a more respectful and stronger community? You cannot have healing until the cause of the pain is dealt with. Some of these people are still in pain or I would not be hearing their stories, now. Well, I have always been a believer in the truth and... the way God has made me, well, I think we need to do this, so here goes...

First, Diane, thank you for your comments.

When I first moved here in 1993, I was going through a divorce and raising a teenage daughter. I won't go into great detail of how we were treated but I can tell you that it was terrible! This island has many clicks, (small groups of small minded thinkers) and if you don't fit into one of these clicks or, you are like me, and don't care to be in a click, then you don't fit in and are not accepted. Let's, never mind the treatment I received, for now, (maybe I will come back to that later). My daughter was being treated so badly, by the other teens, that I had to get her off of the island to finish high school. Most of the children did not accept her. The ones that did, but only to some degree, were the trouble-makers and they, just used her. Some were jealous because she was a pretty girl so, this was held against her too. She was so hurt and she was becoming a child that I no longer recognized, by her behavior. She was loosing all of the good that was instilled in her. I could no longer watch what this was doing to her so she moved in with her grandmother and graduated from my old high school. I seriously doubt that the behavior, here, has changed much. Because we are such a small community, IT IS MORE IMPORTANT to feel accepted by, and connected, to others.

It isn't about me holding my head high, these problems will never go away, by trying to ignore them, or the people that cause them, in the first place. Some people choose to go through life, with blinders on, some need to live in a "happy bubble" so they don't have to look at the reality of things. Some drink and or use drugs and this is how they cope with life. This is not about what is right or wrong, this is their choice. I, for one, choose not to do that, and yes, sometimes I suffer, for making that choice, but it is my choice.

Yes there are many wonderful people here. Some of them have actually told me that they choose not to go out, very often, so they are kept out of all of the nonsense that goes on here.

I COULD give you a list of the people who have offended me, but I would get a cramp in my hand and probably end up with a splitting headache to boot! There is no mistaking or misunderstanding their intentions. These people know who they are and they should be ashamed of themselves for the pain that they inflict upon others. ...and yes, these things go on, all over the world, but WE live HERE and it is HERE, that WE can make a difference!! I pray for these people...I pray for them to open their eyes, minds and hearts... there IS a better way, if we are willing and just allow it!

I do not need my horn tooted either. But I am tired of these petty people complaining about what I do and how the donations are spent on decorations that are not necessary and cost too much, then I have to clarify that I purchase all of the decorations and the donations go right back to the community for prizes, and refreshments, etc., then, my attempt to clarify things gets twisted, by some of these same people, who then have the nerve to claim that I am bragging about what I do.

Excuse me, but, "What the hell is wrong with you people???"

I obtained some of the funding, for the Easter activities, from the "Hat Decorating" fundraiser. I knew that, probably, not many people would participate but that we would all have fun creating our hats, and we did! Some were laughing at how small the fundraiser turned out. As I said, I expected this and thought that, if it was held again, that more might participate. The goal was to get some women out of their houses to do a craft project and have some fun with it. We went out to dinner, wearing our hats, and had a great time! THAT, was the goal!! I was planning other fundraisers, which were announced on this forum, earlier in the year. Someone found it necessary to jump the gun, so to speak, and use my idea to hold a fundraiser for another cause. I really don't care that this was done either, I posted the idea and at that point, it became fair game. There is one woman, in particular, who has tried to sabotage my efforts and has run around insulting me, behind my back, of course, from day one. She has a bit of an ego problem, (no sarcasm intended) and I will continue to pray for her, especially. Maybe some day, she will let the light shine into her heart and let go of whatever has happened to her, to make her this way. She also seems to have a group of followers that seem to revel in her behavior. This makes things even sadder.

Diane, I am only touching on the tip of the ice burg, as to what I have gone through. I could name, most everyone, who has hurt me, some, I do not know their names but I do know their faces... and I could explain everything that I have been through, living on Beaver Island but, how far down the rabbit hole do we want to go??? I have also know people who have had to move off of our little island paradise, because they just couldn't take it anymore. So, can you see why, this is not about holding your head up high and ignoring these people. There is a NEED for change!

As far as the businesses, God bless them, because THEY HAVE given so generously, not just to me, but to all of us who have asked and continue to ask. This it what comes from a strong community, joining together for the greater good!

I also want to thank the other individules, who were generous enough to give donations for past events.

At this point, I just don't have the energy to hold a fundraiser for the Halloween Carnival so I will probably ask for donations. I put out donation cans, in the past, but unfortunately, they took in very little and I believe that one can was tampered with. I really don't have the energy to do the Halloween Carnival but everything has been prepared and is ready, most of all, I would hate to disappoint the children and the volunteers that help me, God bless them, they are willing and ready.

I need to take a moment to thank Sheri and the Community Center for their kind and supportive remarks and, I apologize if people think that this is drawing bad attention to Beaver Island. This is not my intention at all.

Thanks to all of you, who know I speak he truth, for your understanding and support.

Please, if anyone else wants to share, I would encourage it. This is not a bad thing that is taking place and should not be viewed as such.

May God bless us all.
Tina Walker

Party Plan Girl · Post by **Party Plan Girl** » Thu Sep 01, 2011 10:39 am

i want to clarify that, when I use the term "islanders," I am referring to myself, everyone that lives here, whether you are a year-round resident, part time resident and whether or not you are preceded by several generations, or not.

I do love Beaver Island and I did not come here because of the people. (Or maybe I did?)

kathemeade · Post by **kathemeade** » Thu Sep 01, 2011 11:57 am

You asked for others experiences. I will give you mine. Please keep in mind this is not a reflection on you or your feelings or your situation. This is just simply my thoughts and experiences.

My comment and thoughts when I read this thread are:

1. Beaver Island is a unique place, with unique people. It takes a very special person to CHOOSE to live on this island. Winters are long, business is slow.

2. We bought a home here three summers ago and I can honestly say that we have been treated with respect, kindness and care. My family and I have been welcomed to the island.

3. Everyone has a bad day, everyone can at one time or another be misunderstood. I have learned over the years that it is easy to misunderstand someones actions or looks. A response one is given can easily be mistaken for rudeness. Until a person has walked in their shoes it is unfair to judge them. I have taught my children that when they feel others are mistreating them there is usually an underline reason and that 90% of the time it really has nothing to do with them. Most of the time the person they feel is being mean to them is not even giving them any thought, they are just focused on what termoil they are having in their own life.

4. As a business owner myself, I have alot of respect for the business owners on Beaver. If you have never owned a business you can not begin to understand the stress and risk that one takes. To own a business on the island is even more of a risk. Shop local, support local. When it is in the middle of the winter and you need that gallon of milk...you sure feel blessed that there is a place you can buy it. If you want the business's on this Island to still be here next winter then you need to support it year round.

5. As a year round islander I can only imagine it is not easy. I am not one...yet. But when I CHOOSE to be one I will come to the island with the full understanding of the sacrafices, trials, and joys that I will have once I CHOOSE live here year round.

6. As I read this thread the most common thing that comes to my mind is that what we do in our life, who we associate ourselves with, and how we spend our days is OUR CHOICE. No one has control or power over who I am, what I do, or how I choose to live my life.

7. Everyone must CHOOSE their own path. If they don't like how they are treated then they are obligated to CHOOSE to be with those who they feel good around. We are not victims of our lives, we are CHOOSERS of the path in life we take.

8. In closing, my observation is that Beaver Island has a lot to offer, and it also has a lot at risk. If it is not supported and taken care of it will not be the island we have all grown to love.

As an "outsider" looking in I have the utmost respect for the "settlers", "old names", "originals", "islanders". or whatever you choose to call them. Some of them have generation after generation of history here. The people that live here and own land here are the ones that protect the land, run the business's, and are becoming part of generation after generation on this island.

The funny thing is that I don't see them referring to themself as "islanders", nor do I see them not welcoming other businesses regardless of how long they have been on the island. People who live on the Island year round and make this their home understand the importance of growth.

This is their home. Regardless of how they got here, how many generations they have been here, this is thier home. They have great pride in it and they have CHOSEN to stay here.

They are also to ones that support new business, new families, and marry and bring in "outsiders" to become part of this island family. This is their heritage, their culture, and their future.

They are instrumental in growth and development, they welcome new people to the island to be part of the community. Are they protective? ...you bet they are! Should they be? ...you bet they should be! Are they passionate about what they think? ...without a doubt! Do they have generations of sacrafice and hardwork at risk? ...YES THEY DO.

There is a balance and my observation is that is it accomplished and done well on Beaver island. Are there issues? Of course there are. Do we need to post them on a public forum? No, I don't think this is the forum for personal agenda's. Good, bad or indifferent, when we start "almost" naming names, making accusations and gossiping then we have taken it a step beyond where it should be. This is not healing, this is not the place. As adults when we have issues with others we need to discuss them with that person or find a neutral third party to help us. We don't need to use a public forum that is used to promote Beaver Isand.

Beaver Island is unique. The people are unique. It is a CHOICE to live here, and an honor to have met so many wonderful people.

Kathe Meade
Proud to say I own a little piece of paradise on Beaver Island.

mcdonoughdiane · Post by **mcdonoughdiane** » Thu Sep 01, 2011 12:28 pm

I am still puzzled by this behavior hasn't changed much here! As far as I know lots of wounderful people have come and gone here and the ones that left are from health issues and family changes such as divorce, etc.

And as far as the school kids go.....My kids were excepted with open arms.....they came with hesitation since they were leaving all there friends and all that they knew and loved and made it here just fine! The kids had some run ins but they learned to deal with them and it made them better and stronger as individulas. Thay had quite a few cousins some would say but you don't always get along with your cousins either so as far as I'm concerend that wasn't a bonus. My oldest son did leavehis Junior year only because he wanted to play football so bad and the school had soccer only....it had NOTHING to do with his classmates

The older kids have always been open a friendly! They also have been VERY good to all my kids. Brandon Maudrie, Kendra Wojan, Dustin Crandal, Erin McDonough, Ryan Wojan, Rory Connaghan, Jessica "McCafferty" Crandal", and many, many others!!!!!!

We have to remember also that there are always two sides to every story and maybe some of the kids that Tina's daughter went to school with should post their side of the story..........ACTUALLY I think this has gone far enough! Maybe we should look to the future and quit dwelling on the past! If I were to dwell on all the imperfections in my past I could make myself pretty miserable!

7. Everyone must CHOOSE their own path. If they don't like how they are treated then they are obligated to CHOOSE to be with those who they feel good around. We are not victims of our lives, we are CHOOSERS of the path in life we take. (Well said Kathy)

I am done with this thread, so everyone enjoy your Labor Day Weekend and cheer on the runners!

Diane